We have just been alerted to the fact that the kids at GAMMON RECORDS have a fantastic proposition for you. On November 4th, they are going to be releasing a LIMITED EDITION VINYL release of Welcome To The Monkey House to the general record buying public. With its shiny yellow vinyl and one-thousand copy press run, this record has invertors from Kenneth Lay to Martha Stewart taking notice! Should you purchase a copy of this “collector’s item” you could very well find yourself rich, rich, rich within one year! We hear that’s how Jack Benny made his fortune.

Or, you can just buy it, smoke some grass, and stare at the big ass banana on the cover, which is really what it’s all about.

The Slimmer Twins (Court and Fathead) will be performing on the legendary KCRW this Thursday morning (Sept 4) at 11am. The performance was recorded live in the studio, oh, a couple of weeks ago, so it’s still not beyond its expiration date.

Hey, we want to say thanks to everyone at college radio in the US for making Welcome To The Monkey House the NUMBER ONE RECORD at college radio this week. Hey, it’s our first number one of any kind in the US, so we’re pretty happy.

Okay, that’s all.

Can you actually believe that for hundreds of thousands of years, mankind lived quite happily without the aid of electricity. In fact, it was just about one-hundred years ago that electricity began to make it’s headway into the lives of everyday man. One-hundred years ago. Socrates didn’t have it. Shakespeare didn’t need it. Oscar Wilde got on quite well without it.

Of course, life back then was also excruciatingly BORING.

Ah ha ha! But nowadays electricity is our slave!! It goes where we tell it to go and bends to our will!! And there’s nothing it can do to stop us!! Join The Warhols tonight, 12:35 et/pt, high atop the GENERAL ELECTRIC (!!) building in New York City for NBC’s LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN O’BRIEN and celebrate of mankind’s complete domination over electricity!!

THE DANDY WARHOLS — ELECTRICITY IS OUR BITCH!

The Dandy Warhols appearance on tonight’s episode of Conan O’Brien has been cancelled due to the power outage. We’ll keep you posted on when it will be rescheduled.

Hey it’s Monday morning, who wants a cigarette? I do, I do! The next couple of weeks, we have a lot of parties and radio stations and TV shows to go to before our tour. Instead the usual poem and/or scrimshaw representation of the upcoming events, here is a handy dandy list.

Thursday 14 – Late Night with Conan O’Brien 12:35 (NBC)
Friday 15 – KROCK 2:30pm
Friday 15 – Housing Works Benefit, NYC 8p (Acoustic)
Friday 15 – Party @ The Plaid, NYC 10:30p (Acoustic)
Saturday 16 – WFNX 3pm
Saturday 16 – Party @ The Pill, Boston 9:30p (Acoustic)
Tuesday 19 – Party @ Revival, Toronto (Acoustic)
Thursday 21 – Party @ Popscene, SF 11p (Acoustic)
Friday 22 – KCRW 1p (Acoustic, broadcast at a later date)
Friday 22 – AOL Sessions (Broadcast in September)
Saturday 23 – Party @ Club Bang!, LA 11p (Brief Acoustic)
*Sunday 24 – Sunset Junction Festival, LA (8:30ish)

And then, it’s the tour, which is outlined on the SHOWS page. Yep.

Public Service Announcement

Hey, we should have done this before we set out on the touring season, but hey, what can you do. We wanted to let everyone know that owing to our near three hour onstage sets, we are no longer touring with support acts. So, kids, when your ticket says “An Evening with the Dandy Warhols” and starts at 9pm, you had better get there at that time an expect to rock. That is all.

xo

Hey, we’ve had a change of plans in regards to our little party up in Vancouver on the 29th. Formerly, we were going to play at the Commodore Ballroom, but then we got to thinking, what if we played an entire show in a hot air balloon!! Dig it! Flying too high with some band in the sky! “But oh! Oh”, they said, with that that scornful gaze beset upon our lofty proposal. “No traders in this rock-and-roll haberdashery shall pollute our pristine heavens! Not on your life, buster!” With downcast eyes, we wept., our dreams a pile of ash dusting our feet.

So, instead of that, we have decided to play for some kicks with REM and Wilco at Thunderbird Stadium that night.

Hey, the date that we are going to be on Late Night with Conan O’Brien has been moved up, from August 15th to August 14th, so set your alarm for that. Also, on the 15th, we will be playing an abreviated acoustic set at Housing Works Used Book Cafe. This show will be a benifit for homeless persons living with HIV and AIDS.

Once again, we must let you know our single for “You Were The Last High” is out and for sale in the usual locations. If you are having trouble finding usual locations, try buying the single HERE.

This message is for the Australians in the audience. Hey. It doesn’t take a genius to figure it out. You kids love us. When those two shows in Sydney and Melbourne sold out so fast, you were crushed. Gothman got so much email from you guys that he had to put down his cigarette to brush away the tears of exhaustion. Anyway, we would have loved to have played more shows down under, but we couldn’t. Our schedule is just too screwy. But rest assured, we will return for something “Big” at the beginning of the year. (“Big”? Get it?)

But, if you can’t wait that long, we have two pair of tickets to give away. One pair for Sydney, July 31 at Metro, and one for Melbourne, August 3 at Hi Fi. The catch? The winners, get this, draw or Photoshop their best rendition of The Dandy Warhols getting saved from certain death by either a crazed dingo, a evil giant bong, or George Lucas. It’s your choice, so have fun with it. When you’re done, send your entries to certain_death@dandywarhols.com. The winners will be chosen by Gothman and some of his cronies. Get crackin’, Picasso!